The Deepest Blues Are Black

BLDGLHDFJ something tells me I am ill, and yes, I am ill and something is wrong. Lately my diet has been letting me down, and things I usually eat are bothering my stomach to the point where I want to puke, or I get constipated, bloated, and just feel ill. Lilian suggested I see a doctor, and that might be a good idea.

I don’t know how long this has been happening; I can’t remember. But for quite some time, perhaps a few months, I have been feeling this ridiculous bloat after eating pretty much anything, and then feeling stomach pains. Today I felt some nasty chest pains. It’s not pleasant at all. I hate it.

The only changes I’ve made to my diet are:

  • cutting out chocolate and candy/lollies and any such foods
  • eating smaller meals but more frequently.

I cut out chocolate a lot because I tend to eat it a lot if it’s just… around. We’ve got some in the cupboard now, and it gets hard to resist. The easiest thing to do is to just make a goal to keep off it, which is what I’ve been doing lately. As for eating smaller meals, it prevents me from overeating. I don’t know if I overeat a lot, but I definitely did that today and I’ve noticed that since I’ve eaten six small meals a day instead of three large ones, I have eaten generally less.

My stomach is so small. Ugh, I’m not even going to talk about it. I just know that I can’t eat a lot and that lately I’ve been feeling ill. I haven’t made other changes to my diet but now I’m wondering if I’m lactose intolerant or something. I don’t have much dairy other than some butter and milk, though.

And sleep? I guess I have been sleeping late, but I’m still getting enough. On my days off I squeeze in about ten hours, and I sometimes nap. I can’t say my sleeping patterns have changed much in the past two years, so I don’t think that is a contributing factor to these digestive problems.

I would go and see the doctor, but I hate doing so. I hate going there and waiting for two hours only to see the doctor for five minutes. I am always bored in that waiting room, among all these other sick people. I don’t know if I should listen to music or read or look at magazines there. I hate it. But I guess I should be grateful that I am rarely sick. I don’t see much point in making an appointment either, because other people with appointments take forever to see the doctor – they take half an hour… and as they walk out they’re still chatting to the doctor about something completely unrelated to their broken leg. Doctors have work to do. You’re there to receive their help and guidance as a professional, not for a bloody casual chat. Other people are ill and want to see the doctor too.

Every time I whine about this to someone, they agree. Who are the people who take forever with the doctor? Probably the elderly. I don’t mean to be biased and nasty, but hey, they could be lonely, they could need more help. That said, though, I find that a lot of elderly people are really rude to anyone younger than them. It’s always been some kind of ridiculous societal rule to “respect your elders”. The only thing I have against this is that some elderly people can’t even respect teenagers or young adults. They don’t just automatically gain respect. They have to earn it. I’m very disgusted at the amount of elderly people who look down on people my age, or children in school, particularly the latter, because all they want to do as thirteen-year-olds is have a bit of fun and do silly things. You were once a kid, stop scoffing at the innocent.

Sure, kids have changed since the early 1900s, but that doesn’t mean you own the place and should expect everyone to respect you.

Also, my 5:00-8:00pm classes aren’t bad. I got let out last week early… I’m not really looking forward to tomorrow because I just hate night classes in general, but, whatever. I’ll bite the bullet and deal.

Comments on this post

Hai! 8D

Poor Wuggs! *Huggs* eat more fruit and vegetables; try avoid meat and dairy for a few days. /sweat
although that might be hard. NGEO

Yeah, I hate doctor lines as well. It’s why I avoid going, but if it’s absolutely necessary (hasn’t been for a few years, phew. Although I’m sure by now living in 21st century Australia has bestowed me with some sort of deep-set problem which will bite me in the ass later on, as things do.

I know a lot of old white people look down on me. They see me, and us, as people who’ll never fit in. Partially I’d imagine it’s due to their upbringing, where foreigners were this big dangerous new thing like a slow-burning plague. Who knows. Maybe they know something about the future I don’t, /sweat


James, you’re supposed to get a check-up once a year! Bad! That is all.

Oh no! I hope you feel better soon Georgina! Truly, I hate it when other people get sick. I wish I could help you somehow. /sends over a batch of cookies.
I guess I’ll send over cookies without chocolate. Aww.

I don’t like the dentist more than doctors. Haha. But, your speculation is right. My dad is a doctor, and the reasons he gets behind on schedule:

1.) People who schedule early appointments are late.
2.) The lonely elderly people keep telling him stories.

Once in awhile they talk so much, my dad has someone pretend to call him. He feels bad, but the other patients are getting annoyed in the front.

Get well soon!!

Aw… Georgina, I am sorry you are feeling so icky after eating! That is never a good feeling… :( I hope you are able to get to the doctors soon and get everything figured out… if that happened to me, I’d feel like I just shouldn’t eat and that’s NEVER a good thing to think! I totally understand what you mean sometimes too, at the doctors office. I was actually really upset at this one doctor early in my pregnancy with Easton… she was 10-15 minutes late after we were already put in a room and she came in, asked a few questions, was in there about TWO MINUTES and left…. I don’t think she even looked at me. I was like, “really? I hope we dont’ have her again!”

Awe. I truly hope you feel better. Your symptoms sound just like ones I had a few years ago, although it only lasted a week. Ruined my spring break. But yes, it’s quite horrid. I hope you manage to go see a doctor soon.

I agree with you with the elderly subject. I’m sure I’m respectful around elders, and I try my very hardest to be. However, they still give me that look, and I wonder if I’d done anything wrong. I feel as if ageism could be applied the other way around too,

Anyway, feel better. ♥

Wow, you truly sound down in the dumps, which is such a shame to hear! I hope your pains and illness go away soon, and as much as I agree with you on the doctor front, they’re there for your health. If your uncomfortable and worried, take advantage of their services to get help! It’s a couple of hours in a waiting room… What would you do on a long train journey, bus or plane? Think of it like that to get rid of your anxiety about visiting the doctors in particular. Do what calms you when you’re travelling. Especially if you can’t think of any major changes in your lifestyle. The smaller meals and cutting out chocolate you have described seem only healthy for you, so if there are problems and you are worried.. I’m sorry, but man up and go! If you haven’t got your health, you haven’t got anything. And totally in agreement with the elderly comments, I work in a care home during summer holidays, and there are a few who are slightly bossy and ignorant of the fact that young people are trying to help them. They’re stubborn, old ways, I guess!? I hope to read that you feel better soon. ♥

Oh, I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t been too well. Being sick is never fun but it’s worth the doctor’s appointment :( . Luckily stomach bugs are a bit easier to cure. I hope you feel better though.

Who are those people? Well, my mom for one. And my grandma. They make their appointments together so that they can have chats with their doctors /hmph . But the elderly are pretty difficult. There are those to be respected but they definitely can’t take kids out of their youth to care for them so that they’re happy when they die. My grandma wasted a lot of my time until about 4 years ago. I mean, she’s cool and all but there’s so much I wish I had done instead of being dragged to operas and old people parties.

I guess that night classes take up prime time? That’s a bit of a bummer, but at least it’s for a short while, I think?

Yea, I’d probably filter any submissions for a contest, especially since so many pass by the internet and just… leave.
Food poisoning is terrible! What’s worse is that my airplane kept serving the same meal that food poisoned me at the hospital and I kept turning it down O_O .

Studying sounds pretty exciting. I was thinking that I’d evolve with technology but I worry about things like the rest of the world shutting down the internet or something. But I think that I might give web design a poke, considering that learning it on my own hasn’t gotten me too far. Communications sounds pretty fun though. Is it like a focus on technology or people?

Thanks :) A lot of schools here are either good and offer boring subjects or have fun subjects but a GPA of like a 2. But oh well. :P

I think that you’re probably fighting a big virus or glob of bacteria. I had a friend who went through a phase where she was tired all the time, and it turns out that she had mono and didn’t know it. The changes you’ve made in your lifestyle should definitely be helping you, rather than hurting you. I hope that the doctors will fix it all up for you soon!

I agree with you about the elderly, and luckily, I have met both types of elderly people. There are some who are tired of life and stop caring about the fact that other people matter too. There are some that are indeed lonely, and I pity them. There are also some who know that the phrase “respect your elders” means that they should act like they deserve the respect. I hope that your appointment goes well!

*HUG* I think you should go see a doctor … stomach pains aren’t always nothing. If it has continued for a few months it might be serious, not that I’m trying to be the Grim Reaper or something! It probably isn’t stress since you are getting enough sleep and knowing you you’re great at time management you shouldn’t be too stressed. But you should also check for what foods you might be allergic to?

I know you don’t want to though because I too hate doctors.

I hope you feel better soon. I know pain is not fun. I hope you can get it all sorted out whether or not you have to go to the doctor.
I used to have this thing against black men (I’m black so I can kinda say it :) ) because they don’t have respect for younger ones either. But my mom pointed out that it is in every culture. I think it comes down to they were treated the same and never taught different. I’m glad that I’m not their mothers so I don’t have to go around screaming at them when they get in my face. I can just walk away and kinda forget the conversation.
But it seriously stresses me out when I have to deal with people like that. It’s like seriously person, boundaries! I’ll stay on this side and you stay on that side leave me alone and judge your own kids for pete’s sake!
Thanks, I’m glad you like the layout. :) I’m trying to make it a goal to stay away from gray from now on. :D
Yeah I agree both types of designs work, Simplistic or sophisticated. It just depends on the employer I guess. And I have no idea what they want as of right now.

It’s amazing that you’re managing to stick on a diet, even if you are feeling ill. =[ I’m sorry to hear that! It’s never fun when you’re sick.

“Grazing,” or eating smaller amounts but throughout the day (like you’re doing), is actually a lot better for you. It keeps your metabolism continuously running, so in the end, you actually end up burning more calories. ^^ Interesting, no? Plus, like you said, you don’t get hungry as often, so you don’t shove your face full at a big meal, like dinner.

Isn’t it amazing how you can hate someone so thoroughly (I guess “hate” is strong — be incredibly pissed at is what I mean) and yet love them unconditionally? I think it’s something that can only happen with siblings, or family in general. And no, he’s not gone forever. What I didn’t specify in my blog post is that he’s moving to the same area where my mom’s family is from. I usually make it down there once or twice a year, so it’s not as if I’m never going to see him again. Gosh, I don’t even want to think that would happen!

Yes, my friends keep me distracted. Actually, I’ve been doing a lot with friends lately. For someone who is usually a hermit, I’ve been a bit of a social butterfly lately.

I need to get onto that layout thing. /ho I haven’t had time to put everything in .ZIP files. But I’m trying to add PHP files to the .ZIPs, too, and that’s been a pain in the ass.

I love all your emoticons. ^^ They’re very cute, and best of all, you managed to keep them small. I always tend to make mine too big.

Ah, doctors. If you don’t already, try getting appointments as early as possible: if your appointment is at 10am, you’ll get in sooner than if your app’t is at 3pm, because, yes, their app’ts start running late. True, some of the people take up precious time by chatting about the weather or traffic, but most of the time, the condition they’ve come to see the doc about just turns out to be more involved than thought. (Most offices I’ve worked with tend to allot 20-30 minutes per appointment.) But yes, I hate those people who just talk and talk and talk. Even worse are the ones who come in for X and, in the middle of an app’t, mention Y. I’ve seen people come in with heartburn and suddenly mention the leg pain they’ve been having, or their constant headaches. Oh, and they also have allergies. Way to eat into the next appointment blocks, person. (Because yes, if they say “I need to see the doc for A, B, and C,” they can get a longer app’t block, so they don’t push everyone else back.) GAH.

Re: the elderly though, I do have to disagree a bit there. True, many haven’t earned respect (I do absolutely agree with the “You want to be respected, you have to earn it” thing), but many *have* earned it. “Respect” doesn’t mean “treat X as the King or Queen of the Earth;” it just means you don’t tell them to “f*ck off and die” or “get the f*ck out of the way, old lady” (both things I’ve seen teenagers do to old people in the past WEEK). I’ve worked with the elderly for over a decade (volunteering at nursing homes, doing clinicals in hospitals, etc), and you wouldn’t believe some of the things I’ve personally seen the “innocent” say and do to their elders. I’ve seen wonderful, sweet, respectful old people gradually become cantankerous, crotchety, down-right mean old biddies because they’ve been treated so poorly by the people around them — and that’s just normal, day-to-day disrespect and hostility, not counting the horrific elder-abuse I’ve seen. No, you don’t have to respect your elders just because they’re old, but it’s not unreasonable to be polite and nice to them. Sure, some of them are just plain mean, but you don’t know which ones are suffering from dementia or Alzheimer’s, and mean because they don’t understand what you’re telling them, or where they are. And really, even if an someone is bitchy and mean to you, there’s nothing more satisfying to me and infuriating to them than to be polite and respectful to them — when they’re mean, I just don’t take their bait. It drives them batty and amuses me to no end. Killing with kindness and all that. ;)

All that said, some are just mean old buggers. Them I just don’t like. :

Oh, and also, the medgeek & nursing student in me has to mention your symptoms kind of sound like an ulcer. Get thee to a doctor. :P

Lollies just sounds so cute! :P I don’t know why, but every time I see it/hear it, I find it to be so cute! :P

I napped today; it was weird. But in my defense, I was holding Rosy, one of our kittens… They just … make me so dang tired and want to love on them whenever they cuddle up with me on the couch! x) 😴

Too many of the elderly folk seem to think everyone born in the 1990 and above is a horrible generation and all alike. They act like we’re the most stubborn peoples on Earth, and it’s just way too aggravating for me. Blah, blah, blah. It just gets on my nerves.

I’m glad your night classes aren’t too shabby! :3

If you don’t feel the need to go to the doctors about your digestive system, you can always email me because I know ALL about this as I have been to doctors about stuff like this ALL my life. And it’ll cost you nothing :-D It’s no fun feeling so ill, and you’re a tiny little thing so losing weight wouldn’t be ideal for you ♥

Just like you… I really don’t like visiting the doctor. If you remember on my previous post… I waited for about 3 hours for my turn and he just told me “come back here when you get the x-ray result.” It didn’t even last for 5 minutes! /hmph

I love eating. I feel like I’m already overweight. LOL. and chocolates… why oh why… it’s one of the greatest thing ever created by mankind. :D I hope you’re alright though. ♥

Awww! *hugs* Get well soon! :D Try drinking some green tea if you like it, it helps with digestion and stomach related things. I drink it whenever I have pains and it does make me feel a lot better. :D

I hate seeing Doctors as well. Sometimes when I atually talk to them I feel as though they don’t understand what I mean? XD I don’t know. Don’t get me started on waiting. I hate that waiting room. I hate waiting. Dx

I know what you mean. Most elderly people disrespect people my age and immediately think they should be respected. It’s like why should I respect you if you don’t respect me?

I’m so sad to hear about your health condition lately. Do see a doctor, maybe it could just be a small problem like gastric or stress. Hope you get well soon. But, all the symptoms that you have shared, I’ve gone through too. These symptoms are actually gastric symptoms. When I eat spicy food, I feel like a strong pain in my tummy. It’s because I don’t eat regularly especially when my mum cooks fish. “I’d rather be a vegetarian, than eat fish”. XD

And don’t make yourself stressed up. Get regular sleeps. Food & sleep are two things that I don’t compromise. I used to have lots of homeworks last year in school, and during recess my friends would be in classroom doing their homeworks. But I would be in the canteen eating without caring about my homeworks. Haha,.

Frankly speaking, I hate going to the doctor. I remember once I nearly fainted in hospital. I just hate hospitals. Anyway, I hope you find a solution for your problem. Will be praying for you, Take care, Georgina. Followed you on Twitter.


Go to a doctor, I hate going to a doctor but sometimes you have to do it. As cliche as it is to say it, it’s better to be safe than sorry, and hopefully some medication will be all you need to get you back to the right path. It’s odd that it’s flared up though, if all you’ve cut out is chocolate. Hope you’ll find the cause of it soon.
I’m glad you think you’re getting enough sleep, and that your late classes aren’t so bad.

I give respect to everyone automatically, but if they don’t return it, they lose respect, and often it’s the elderly. I’ll give up my seat for them on a bus sure, but they have no right to stand at the bus stop and tell me how they hate my generation, or cut infront of me in a queue. Just because you’re old doesn’t mean you can do what you want and get away with it.

This sucks T_T I am prone to constipation and thus bloating so I know part of your troubles and hope that you feel better soon…a doctor might be able to help so yeah that would be a good idea. Maybe eating lots of fiber would help with the constipation part?

I have had chest pains before due to uhm “gas” created thanks to constipation. I usually tend to have tummy troubles during my menstruation and I don’t know what it is but they have a connection in my scenario. It is almost like a hint/warning for me. Anyways going back to your diet changes…I tend to eat a lot of chocolates too and sometimes I hate myself for buying them (since I am the one who buys all my groceries so I am to blame *dies*). I overeat whenever I comfort eat both of which suck. I use a trick of keeping all my “snacks” in difficult to reach places so that most times I would just give up due to laziness which works pretty well in my case XD. Not sure if I should be proud of that but it helps. I also will try not to buy things that will harm me later because even having them in the house is very tempting.

I think my stomach is huge and keeps asking for food even when it doesn’t need it T_T hmm lactose intolerant maybe ask the doc about that?

OMG I learned the hard way that sleep is one of the causes of tummy trouble…since a lot of your digestive process occurs during sleep-time if you are not getting the proper amount of rest your digestive system will falter and hence you will feel “sick”. But if you think you were fine before with the same sleep patterns then maybe it is not this…but you never know…I would suggest trying to get 7-8 hours of continuous sleep everyday for a week and see if that helps. This sickness might be your body’s way of rebelling against your sleepless routine and maybe your stomach can’t handle it anymore?

I guess since both my parents are doctors I never had to make appointments with others so I wouldn’t know how troublesome that is. Even for fields where my parents don’t specialize I would just visit some of their friends and the wait would usually not be that bad or since I rarely had to visit others I probably never noticed it. The only doctors I really hate are dentists and my sis is one lol.

I think the elderly are very strongly opinionated and will often look down upon young people because they have less experience. I guess old age makes most of us grumpier as well. I try to stay away from grumpy old peeps ^_^; but some of them can be nice but I am assuming not the sick ones.

I like that fact about evening classes that you are often let out earlier XD. I guess I differ from you in sort of liking evening classes but yeah they can be annoying since they seem to take up most of your day when you would normally plan fun things or at least I did.

I hope you feel better soon :( lately I’ve been having issues eating as well and I’m thinking its a developing allergen to cheese and dairy products and some meats..

I agree with the elderly bit. I’ve met some very rude elders just because they were older than I or my family they expected us to do whatever they say without question or they’d just become extremely bossy and bitter. I think we should honor and respect our elders, however I do agree that respect must be earned.

I’m lactose intolerant, so I’ve had to change my diet recently. I still eat SOME dairy products but not as much. I can relate to the constipation, I can’t stand it. >_< Sometimes at work it affects me to, that part sucks. haha.

I can't stand elderly people who are rude either. Like, I normally work at the cash register at work and some elderly people just throw their money down on the counter instead of handing it to me…pretty rude. What if I just threw your change down? Bet they wouldn't like that.

At the doctor I go to, they have a sign that says something like to only discuss your illnesses that you wrote down on the paper, which is fair. If I came for a cold, I'm not gonna be like, "oh wait, also! I have sweaty armpits, I think my pinky might be broken, and OH YEAH, my right hip is bothering me." Yeah, people like that are what take all the time.
I never have to wait more than 15 minutes, or 20 at the doctor, I always make appointments and they get people out pretty fast.

I hope you feel better!! <33

i don’t like the doctors either, i think they’re kind of scary, but i do think you should go! it’s better to go than not to go, just in case it’s something else than dairy products, i hope you feel better soon, everyone needs food!! <3 and water!

whenever i've been to the doctor it hasn't taken too long on the waiting room, i think the longest i've sitting doing nothing is about half an hour. it's not exactly a short period of time, but i know it could've been worse as doctors always are busy.

i think everyone should respect each other. we don't need to worship anyone, but being nice and polite to each other in public is important. what's the point of being rude and ruining someone's day? yes i get easily affected by what others (strangers) say and do to me. if anyone show disrespect, i think about it all day, trying to figure out the reason what i'd done to make this person act like this.

i'm so scared of the dark, and all of the things my eyes can't see. being blinded, unable to see what's in front of me is freaking me out too! death as well, how is i'm going to greet the unknown ;s

take care and feel better soon!! <3

I hope you start feeling better soon. If you’re starting to worry about your feelings, I would go see the doctor – just to be on the safe side in case something is really going on. Cutting out chocolate wouldn’t be that hard for me – cutting out any other candy would be harder. Ha ha. I’ve just had a major change in my diet and honestly I feel great – 100% vegetarian (no meat products/seafood/poultry). Family isn’t supporting it, but I made the change for me not them. The elderly is a 50/50 draw of luck as to if they’re going to be respectful to others (age not mattering) – I’ve seen that in my own life.

Oh no. :( *hugs* I hope you start to feel better Georgie! Although, those are the symptoms I used to get (and still get) when I eat gluten and wheat (it’s called coeliac disease), perhaps a gluten-free diet (that’s gluten, wheat, rye and barley) may help? It’s worth a try anyway.

I hate seeing the doctor as well; my doctor is useless and he puts everything down to iron deficiency and it annoys the hell out of me. I went to him once because I had a nasty infection in my foot and his diagnosis was “you’re probably lacking in iron” WHAT’S IRON GOT TO DO WITH FEET?! god damn. The waiting time isn’t so bad at my doctors though, I’m usually in and out within 20 minutes. I have to see the nurse every 3 months for my injections, but always runs late. :(

I totally agree! When I’m waiting to see the nurse, the doctors surgery is usually packed out with the elderly. I don’t blame them for being lonely and such, besides they probably do have a lot of health problems but half the time, they don’t even need a doctor for their problems, y’know? Plus sometimes they’re extremely rude, pfft.

But yes, I think you should try the gluten-free diet and if that doesn’t seem to help much, try cutting out diary, then other foods groups and see which makes you feel better. Worth a try anyway. :) Good luck and I hope you start feeling better soon. *squish*

ah,right. chest pains. mine was caused by eating disorder thus increasing the gastric and then it went uppppp which causes my chest to be painful… O_O I know about all those yet my eating pattern still haven’t changed,lols.
I hate going to doctor too.. I hate waiting in the hospital. the atmosphere’s so gloomy and boring,ugh.. /hmph
I’m not being rude or anything, I mean I know I should respect those adults…but really, sometimes they’re acting know-it-all and it’s just plain annoying. I hate it when adults can’t respect teenagers because they have this stereotype saying that we,teens are the one who MUST respect them and not the other way round. Worst, adults around me always put me on the bad side, making me look as if I’m the source of problems..ugh.. I got those a lot of times but yeah… I think I can handle it, I think.
Anyways, get well soon, my super favorite blogger :)