Consolation in a Jar

I used to have a blog named Consolation in a Jar, way back in 2006. It had a lot of deep entries, and the name was something that alluded to the depression I was experiencing at the time. And I’m sorry to say that this entry is going to be about my shitty day. It’s past midnight, and I was going to sleep early, but I’m in such a bad state that I have to let this out.

I’m crying. Not like it matters or makes a difference to what I am writing. But every once in a while I like to believe that everyone is allowed to cry and let out their feelings. Even Kevin Wu & Ryan Higa (kevjumba & nigahiga on Youtube) agree that tough guys have feelings, and ‘don’t be afraid to cry; you can still be a manly guy’.

I just emailed someone to cancel a job interview. Why? I couldn’t stand it anymore. The location is far from home. Public transport cannot get me there and I have to walk a mile from the closest bus stop. There are no train stations nearby. I cannot drive. No one can drive me. This is what I envisaged in the future – a job that would take two hours to get to from home, which would not be worth the money I would be getting paid.

It did not seem realistic. The interview was supposed to be at 8:00am before I emailed to cancel. That time is eight hours from now. They never contacted me by phone and I do not have their number. It was the only thing to do. I feel like a tool, cancelling an interview so damn fucking late.

It wasn’t the right job. I was not going to enjoy it.

It was also in stark contrast with the phone call I got earlier today about another job. My details and resume (CV) were forwarded to a company searching for a junior web designer. I was asked about my qualifications and future prospects, and from that phone call from a very lovely lady, I am really hoping to get an interview. Compared to someone who simply emailed me and did not greet me nor mention their name in the email (I had to look at the “from” field), and some place in the middle of nowhere, near no public transport…

Why does looking for a job suck?

Also, while typing this post has calmed me down, I am still irked that my mum forced me to tell her what was wrong. She noticed my bad mood and asked what was wrong, to which I replied, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Please tell me what is so hard to understand about those seven words?

My mum did kindly suggest I look for some shoes. She finished work late and shoes were on sale so she told me to come along shortly before she finished. I found many shoes I liked, but none in my size.

Why do I have to have such small feet? I love them, but I can’t find anything that fits my feet. I don’t have any summer shoes. :(

I still have not been paid for the website work I did. Doubtful, I finally sent another email firmly asking for my payment, to which I finally got a reply. I’m still angry, because I found that the work I had done was deleted. Sign that I’m no longer wanted? Well I’m ready to flip the bird. I just want the money for the work I did.

I miss James. I miss Lilian. Goddamn, I miss everybody.

Comments on this post

I hope you get an interview (and the job) from that call earlier today! Hopefully you can work from home or it isn’t too far. ^^; And that Adrian pays you soon. You deserve someone better to work with.

I’m sure you’ll find other shoes that fit and that you like. I guess you just gotta look at the right places hehe. I still haven’t found a place with jeans that fit me well. D:

Overall, I hope you feel better and that tomorrow isn’t as bad as it was today.

Everybody has one of those days, Georgie. Sometimes we should just accept the fact that we feel shitty, get ourselves a spoon and some Ben&Jerries and become a couch potato for the rest of the day. So be it. Tomorrow is only a day away, as Annie would say. :)

I hope the lovely lady calls you back to ask you for a job interview, that’d be awesome. Good luck with that!

i hope u get that job that u got that phone call from today, it sounds more realistic. u need to bug them until u get paid hun thats what my dad says to his clients.
i have small feet as well and i find it sooo frustrating that the only shoes i can find are to kiddish like with flowers on it or mickey mouse.
as woman we allowed to have these days, thats how God made us.
i hope ur day tomorrow is better hun. (hug)

Aw, I’m sorry to hear about what you’re dealing with :( I hope you get the interview that you want. I know how tough it is to find jobs without transportation options & it really sucks. I can’t wait to get my license. When are you able to get your license? That would make things so much easier.

I also know just how you feel on the employers being shifty when it comes to payments. Way back when, when I got the job at that tattoo place, I sent him the final design & he just NEVER got back to me so I didn’t get paid for the work I did do. And a month or so ago, when I went to talk to David’s boss & he said he’d e-mail me with what else to put on the flyer, I started making it & then just NEVER heard back from him, even after I emailed him asking about it. And David doesn’t work there now because of his school so, idk. It really sucks though, because I wanted to be able to get the experience. These people could at least have the decency to tell us that we’re not needed, instead of just never replying to our emails and what not.

I hope things start looking up for you <3

Thanks for the birthday wishes :D <3 For once, I did have a fantastic birthday & I hope that it stays like that for next year, as well :)

I did the same thing yesterday! Except not Doctor Who, I watched Grey's Anatomy instead xD I wanted to work a bit on my sites, but then I decided that I wanted to just be lazy and watch some TV instead because I haven't done that in awhile xD I love lazy days.

Oh, Georgie! You definitely need a hug. *hugs* I definitely hope that you are able to find a job real soon. However, it sounds like you are more interested in the second job that you told us about. Perhaps, the difficulty with the first job was to let you know that there is something better for you. As for the whole situation with your Mom, I honestly don’t know what to say. Sometimes we all have to deal with times that we don’t want to talk about things, and the people around us want to talk. It’s frusterating because you may not want to talk about things at the current time, but later you may feel the need. :(

I’m sorry your feeling so sad :( *hugs* I say it a lot, but I really do hope you feel better soon. ♥

Crying is never a bad thing. It shows you’ve been strong for too long and need to let it out.

That does sound like a very unrealistic job choice. You shouldn’t feel like a tool at all, a place two hours away that isn’t worth the pay isn’t something you should feel bad about!

Good luck on getting the interview! Junior web designer sounds like something that will suit you very well. :) When one door closes another one opens as they say, I’m sure you’ll be fantastic for the job!

That’s very rude of that person to just delete your work! It’s the same as if you hired someone to say, paint your house. You couldn’t just refuse to pay if the day after you had another decorator paint over it! Bad example I suppose but it’s not fair that you used your own time and effort to do a job and you’ve not been rewarded for it!

Crying sometimes makes me feel better. Are you feeling better? Maybe it’s a good thing that you canceled the job interview…. ? I hope you get the interview from the lady that called and asked qualifications and future prospects. I would not know why looking for a job sucks, I haven’t even ever had a job jet (something to look forward to…). It’s awful that you didn’t get paid for your website work and that it got deleted. What kind of people do that ? /poo Booo!

I really hope things will be looking up in you hunt for a job! *hugs* ^__^

When people ask me what’s wrong and I tell them I don’t want to talk about it, they continue to nag me which only frustrates me more. /angry /bash 🤬 /argh 💥

It is good to let things out. Crying is good. ^^

Sorry about the job thing; it does suck. >.>

When I sleep with my door shut I have nightmares. It’s really weird. Also, I can’t wake up on my own. Someone has to wake me up. It’s a really bad thing, actually, because if no one had awaken me, I would have continued sleeping and not awoken. :(

Yeah? Hmm. This one wasn’t very small. I put it on my wishlist thing, for what I am saving money up for. :P

According to my phone’s converter, 39C is equal 102.20F. That’s hot, but the record for us so far this year (in Texas) has been ~110F to ~112F. D:

Thanks for the tips and to look on youtube, I sometimes look on youtube for hair tips. but never thought of looking for beauty tips.
I’m sorry about the job, but hopefully the other place will give you n interview :D
I kind of wished you lived here, lol. I know how you feel missing people. I miss alot of people too. But at least we wouldn’t be alone if we could go and get a coffee or something :P

I’m sorry you had such a shitty day.
I’m glad that in the end you did cancel your interview as I would hate to work somewhere I wouldn’t like it or it took so long so get there.

I really hope you get the interview with the lovely lady that rang you. That would be totally awesome.

Thank you for voting for me, I really appreciate it.

I am so pleased that I got a phone call from one of the ladies from the courses I applied for and she asked if it was ok to swap the courses around because I had been accepted. I am so proud of myself for getting around to actually applying (as I had keep putting it off as I thought I wouldn’t get accepted). I am so excited and can’t wait for next year to come around. I just have to wait for the acceptance letter.

I’m also glad the pills are starting to work again, but sucks about the orgasming… To be honest it doesn’t really bother me that much. It’ll happen eventually. :) I am liking the time on my own but I think Currar is a little upset as he doesn’t understand. I am going to spend this weekend with him hopefully, if he doesn’t change his plans.

Did you add bold to your text when you wrote me a comment? Or is there something wrong with my coding… It’s just that all your comment is written in bold letters. But never mind. :) I tried to follow the advise of the CSS checker, and fixed my coding. Not really sure what it did to my website.

I don’t exactly want it to rain either. It looked like it was about to rain the other afternoon, so I was hoping it would come and take away some of the heat.

I have yet to visit, but I’ll check it out soon. :)

Haha, aww ♥ Of course everyone is aloud to cry. We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t let it out when we need to. Even the people you would least expect to cry, do actually cry. Even if we bottle everything up, it will all come out eventually.

That makes sense. It’s not really worth getting a job if it’s out of reach. Even if you chose to walk there from the bus stop, you’d be exhausted. You did the right thing I think. A job that is more trouble than it’s worth, isn’t worth it. /eee

Looking for a job sucks because I can’t seem to get one. That’s my excuse any way.

Hehe, it sounds like your mum loves shoes. She’s always buying some, and you’re always borrowing them. So I remember from previous blogs. :)

I have the same problem as you. I am a size ten and a half in shoes. It’s hard to find nice casual or dress up shoes. Sneakers are easy to find in my size, so I’m always wearing them.

Aw, it really seems like you had a horrible day. I think you made the right decision canceling the interview though. It’s so not worth it working so far from home, especially if the pay isn’t good. And if I haven’t confused myself, it seems you already have several jobs. What do you mean your work was deleted though? I get a bad vibe from that … O_O

I have the same problem when shopping for shoes. Everyone has much bigger feet! I see a lovely shoe I love, and … it’s too big. Yeah, thanks for the excitement. 😒

I am hoping to grow out of my dislike for my name. Omg I’d find it amusing and interesting if you blogged about it! Though you probably have plenty to blog about already. I like Gii, haha, I think it’s cute. I like it when people abbreviate their names to just their first letter. One of my friends has this long name that starts with A – I can’t spell it – so she just abbreviates it to A.

Gina is cute too … more as nickname than a full name. I actually really dislike it as full name but nickname it’s totally fine. I’m not sure why or how that is. /eee

You’re in 2nd year of university right? Still not used to the papers? Gah now I’m scared I’ll never get used to them! And I hear about annotated bibliography, they sound like nightmares! Not to mention the worst nightmare of 8-page papers. And it’s okay haha, one of my friends hates the word college – and she’s American. XD

I really do need to stop! I’ve already sent out a couple of closed forms, so from now on I won’t apply for anything that I’ll end up closing in a month. I guess I was starting to become a collector. I saw your Tweets about Japanese food, haha. Did someone end up applying for it?

From what you said, it makes me feel bad that I can’t say the same thing about my mom. We used to get along a whole lot better but ever since high school started our relationship has gone down … because I’m not living up to her expectations of me.

My friends are both Asian and American. The Americans just don’t seem to understand a lot things my mom does. Yeah we’ve talked about that before haha. It’s another thing my American friends don’t seem to get. They don’t want to live with their parents now that we’re finished with high school, and their parents don’t want them at home.

I know right! It hurts when she says my English is bad too! But yes, good idea, grin and bear is because she’s wrong. How’s she gonna like it if I say her Korean is bad? I probably shouldn’t try that if I don’t want a lecture or grounding.

The whole water restriction thing is so strange to me because we’re never in drought, but I’d expect Australia to be in drought in summer. That’s what I hear. But why restrictions in certain hours? Wouldn’t people just use a lot of water in the other hours then?

LOL “Australian sun is mean” sorry but that’s so funny! Hahaha. Okay sorry. XD I’ve never been to the south (as in Florida) in the summer so I don’t know much about strong sun. I’d love to visit the tropic lines though where the sun is shining directly overhead at noon. Don’t forget sunscreen if then …


*hugs* for the tears :(. But those guys are right. You should cry sometimes, otherwise it all builds up and that’s like…not cool :(.

Lucky you cancelled the job interview. They don’t sound very professional. The company I mean. They should have given you a phone number. What happens if there’s an emergency? Silly company. And TERRIBLE location. Everytime I think about the location, I’m like D: you can NOT be serious! It’s in like No-Where-Land. NO WHERE LAND! At least you emailed them to cancel your job interview :). Some people just wouldn’t turn up XD. Though for a company like that, I’d not blame them a BIT.

Let’s hope you get an interview for that other job. *crosses fingers* ✌️. It sounds SO MUCH BETTER!

There is NOTHING hard to understand about those seven words /angry. No matter WHO it is, NO-ONE should be allowed to force you to say stuff you don’t want to /angry. It’s a terrible thing to do. We can remain silent if we want. It’s OUR CHOICE. Hmph! At your mother. HMPH!

It sucks that you didn’t find any shoes :(. Maybe next time? You will get your summer shoes eventually! :D.

That ASS better pay you. Or ELSE! Hmph! /pow. I wouldn’t do anymore work for him after this anyways. That JERK!


Hi! *hugs*

Haha yes, and glad you liked the video too. It’s okay to cry. :)

Yeah, I think it’s better that I did tell them; it would have been ruder and worse if I just didn’t turn up. Better late than not turning up. At least I hopefully won’t have to see them again in future. I would have liked the job but the distance really bothered me.

No news from the other job but I really hope I get an interview and someone calls me about it soon! Here’s hoping they won’t call me while I’m at work or something. :P Once I was called about a job when I was at work; I had to go outside and pretend I was going to the bathroom. D:

I hope so! I will have to stick with sneakers for now, which don’t look good with everything. :P

I got the money today; I just checked. Hooray. /bounce

That’s so sad! But that job prospect in the middle of nowhere sounds a bit iffy to me. I don’t known, maybe I’m a paranoid parrot about it, but it sounds way too unprofessional to be a real company.

Also, I think that in the MOM HANDBOOK there’s a special chapter “I don’t want to talk about it-IGNORE> PESTER ON!” . I sometimes just flat lie to my mom about back pains or head aches.

I hope you get the second job and hopefully everything will turn out OK, because you know what they say if it’s not a happy ending, it’s not the end!

*hugs* It’s alright to cry sometimes you know. It’s ok even for guys. Crying actually lets out a lot of emotions and make you feel much better afterwards.

You shouldn’t go for a job unless you are happy with it. It’s not just them picking you, it’s also you picking them. It’s really important that you are right for them as they are also right for you. I have declined many interviews before because the company just wasn’t what I was looking for.

It’s hard to find a job but you will eventually, just don’t give up.

Good luck with that designer role, hope you will get an interview.

I don’t mind people ringing me a few hrs after texting me because it could be something important. If it’s for something not important then I get a bit “grr”. We don’t have an answer phone on our home phone so just keeps ringing and ringing.

Hi, i’m commenting from phone so it will be real short and quick for now. I will leave a more complete one after i finish my history papers tomorrow. :)

Big hugs. I’m sorry about your bad day. There doesn’t seem to be an end to your bad days. I hope that i could do something to cheer you up. :( it’s okay to cry. There’s nothing to be ashamed of! Who doesn’t cry? I cried yesterday. I was really nervous because of my exam. I think i should be ashamed. Heh.

I hope that client of yours will pay you asap. It seems to me that he’s using you. I hate to have my emails not replied asap when it is really important. It’s money that we’re talking about now, i think he should pay you as soon as you finished your job and for what you had done for him even if he had removed your work! Grr!

I know how it feels like to be forced to do something that you do not want to do. I don’t know why your mum forced you. Hugs. I know that sometimes we just do not want to talk about what happened when we are mad. But at least your mum was quite kind to ask you to go and choose a few shoes after noticing your bad mood. :) my mum will sometimes do that but it all depends on her mood too. If she’s not in a good mood and neither am i, she wouldn’t give a damn about how i feel.

Ah, i wish that you will be hired by that lovely lady you said. She sounded .. lovely, haha. I think you’ve made a right decision to cancel that job. It doesn’t worth it, in my opinion, since it will take you so long to reach there.

It must be disappointing to not be able to find the right size for the shoes you like. Hugs. Perhaps you should go to the other outlets? I’m sure you will be able to find the ones you like and matches your feet. :)

that’s it for now. I’m sorry for not capitalising the alphabets that i should. I need to finish this quick and then continue my studies. Plus, i just hit the stupid exit all button just now. Grr. And i’m afraid to hit it again so i better hit post now. I hope you will have a better day tomorrow! Hugs. :)

Thanks Rin! ♥ It’s alright, you leave me nice comments all the time.

You shouldn’t be ashamed either; sometimes we can get really stressed out when it comes to work and exams. :)

He paid me today or yesterday (not sure, but I just checked) so everything is okay. I just find it suspicious that he deleted the work I’d done. It’s as if he’s sending the message that he doesn’t need me anymore. At least I did get paid though; he’s probably going to keep bugging me, but he did say to put the work on hold. It just seems I’m not needed anymore I guess. :|

Well actually, my mum took me to find shoes before we had that argument. But that night she didn’t say anything more, and when she asked about the crappy far-away job the next day, she was nice about it. :)

Shoes are really expensive so my mum took me to one where there was a sale. I think there will be more soon since Christmas is coming up hehe. <3


OMG, I am amazed at how much craps I could type by using phone. /bash

Oh I see, I’m glad that he has paid you. :) Well, maybe you could use the time (when your work is on hold) to find other work. :D He doesn’t give me a good impression.. (you talked about him in previous posts too) /ho

WOOTS! Seeing your mum was nice about the job thing, I’m glad for you. /bounce It feels nice whenever my mum does that (like what your mum did). How should I put this.. it makes me feel that because my mum knows how I feel, so she was nice when she asked about that thing. ♥ This is just how I feel, heh. :/

Yeah, I hope that there will be more sales with shoes that fit into your feet. :D Happy holiday ~

I still can’t enjoy mine yet …. 7 more subjects to go. /wah /wah /wah

The pain gets unbearable sometimes for me cause most of my throat has been scarred from stomach acids : but yeah, I don’t know how someone could swallow them & not realize it, it’s nasty. I always want to be changing things so I think of them randomly. But I usually start trying to change them then & there because if I wait until New Years to start changing everything, nothing will change. It’s just all too much at once.

Coming from someone who used to hate crying, I cry all the time. I used to hate it. I always felt like I had to be strong & hide everything because then people will think I’m weak & take advantage of me like one, extremely hated person, did to me. I know now that crying does help. It lets thing out. But it gets to a point where if it’s everyday, then there’s an issue. That’s probably the point I’m at. Considering what you’ve been through & what you’ve gotten through, it’s definitely okay to cry. I sure hope your bad days don’t continue. Everyone has a rough day every once & a while. I’m sure everything’s going to be just alright (:

Wow I’m sorry you are feeling so stressed out, I do hope that things get better.

I agree, people shouldn’t be afraid to cry. Everyone cries, and everyone gets stressed out, and I believe that every one in a while you just need to let it out.

I would hate to travel so far for a job, especially one that I wasn’t even happy doing. So I think that what you did what right; sometimesss that all you can do, what you think is right and not what others may think.

I once started a layout or something, then they closed their site and decided they didn’t want it and never paid me back. It pissssedd me off so much. But eventually they ordered again, I let them know it pissed me off, and they paid me extra.

I do hope you feel better though :(

I’m sorry you had such a terrible day. :/

I hate trying to find a job. I’ve just been looking for a part-time job that I can do on the side of school and everything else I’m doing, and I haven’t even managed to snag an interview yet. It sucks. I really hope you get an interview for that job, and then I hope you actually get it. Good luck!

It must be a mom thing, forcing us to tell us what’s wrong. The other day I had a crap day; I failed my physics test, my boyfriend and I got in a fight, then at my piano lesson I broke down crying and ended up quitting. Five years of lessons just wasted. So afterwards I was bawling and my mom kept pestering me about what was wrong and I just did not want to talk about it. Eventually I calmed down and we talked.

I hope you feel better and that you have a better day tomorrow! -hugs-

dont be so negative! its not necessary lol
think of it as an adventure it should be fun looking for a job. if you know your the shit at what you are capable of doing worry about choosing the RIGHT job that will benefit you in the end. you are not being chosen!

having connections is good, so be nice to everyone. could be your mom’s friends, your dad’s, your best friends mom… etc etc.

have fun! and enjoy it.. at least your not working with a bunch of idiots who get on your nerves everyday. ;]

Oh yes, bad days suck. Clients from hell doubly so.

Also that interview you canceled, I think you made the right decision (even discounting the commute time): what kind of person send you an e-mail and doesn’t introduce him/herself? Though PR people generally tend to have this mile long email signature where they have their contact data. I’m assuming this wasn’t the case?

I once had someone e-mail me, claiming they found my CV on an online Resume site, and yet they still managed to butcher my last name almost beyond recognition. I did refuse, although not on these grounds. When I told my mom, she claimed I was concentrating on stupid things. Just how bloody hard can it be to copy and paste something? :(

Hope your other job interview opportunity will go through. :)

Thanks Vera! I ended up getting the money when I checked my bank account today, so that’s a plus.

This man didn’t even have a signature! I could only tell what his name was from the “From” field. Essentially, his reply to my resume and cover letter was “We are at [address]. When can you come in for an interview?”

He’d even spelled the suburb/town name wrong, too. I didn’t have any details except for his email. I guess I could have checked out the company’s website, but I didn’t want to phone him up when he’d only bothered contacting me via email.

It annoys me when people send me emails or reply to my emails addressing me as “Georgia” or “Georgiana”. I get “Georgie”, since it’s in my email address itself, but when I send an email with “Regards, Georgina”, people just… don’t get it right. @_@

Hey Georgina! First off, I wanna thank you for leaving me comments on my site even though I haven’t returned any of yours for quite awhile now — It means a lot to me! ✌️ ♥

As for your blog entry, I think you did the right thing, cancelling that job interview. It seems to me that it was misleading and sketchy at best! Although I, too, would feel horribly awkward and embarrassed to simply reply cancelling as opposed to calling with lots of time to spare, but you know what, you did your best. If you’re still worried about it now, don’t be! Something right will come along, you just have to be both persistent and patient. /eee

I cannot fathom not getting paid for webdesign work, oh my God. Never mind what your client has done is illegal! Is there any action you can take at all …? I can’t think of anything … Save sending them eMails laced with lawyeresque phrases, heh.

And the shoes, of course, aren’t that big of a deal, but I personally know that when little ‘unimportant’ things like that get stacked on top of ‘important’ things, it becomes seriously overwhelming and difficult to deal with. :(

shoe shopping is hard. I can never find shoes my size. they always say they have the smalller or the bigger ones and they never fit.

it is annoying they don’t pay you. you did something for their website, you deserve a form of payment.

and I’m sorry you feel bad. I know those moments. those are the ones that everybosy, even the nicest person can bother you. and people are always curiuos what is wrong, so when they don’t have a clear answer, they keep asking.

I too have tiny feet. I feel you. I hate I can hardly find anything, but let me give you a tip. I fit into kids shoes (size 5 ) and they are cheaper, AND sometimes nicer then adult shoes, seriously (Y)

And yes it is ok to cry. It’s an emotion that is underused and something that most times makes you feel so much better after you have. I haven’t cried for a while lately but that is my medication shutting it off for the moment with Christmas coming.

I hope you get your money, that’s just bullshit … and I hope you’re feeling better also ♥ ♥