The Importance of Being Idle
I just realised that I like to write. Well, I didn’t just realise it, but for years, I lost interest in writing narrative, which led me to believe that my quality of writing and the enjoyment I got out of it was seriously deteriorating. Yet I’m here blogging.
I always tell people that their blogs should not, and should never be, somewhere where they think they must post on a daily, weekly, fortnightly or monthly basis. Blogs need not be regularly posted to. As a blogger, you should have the say in when a new post is posted. It’s your blog. You don’t need to keep worrying about people who want to read it. More often than not, if they expect a new post and don’t find it, they will return when there is one.
For the past few days, I’ve had a really, really rough time at home. I don’t want to detail it. I have decided to make it permanent that I will not detail my personal problems on my blog. As I said earlier, is it my blog, ergo I can post what I wish, when I wish. And I guess personal things are just not things I want to include here. Some people have asked me what has been going on, and sometimes I tell them more privately through email or other such methods. But it’s been terrible.
To try and take my mind off things, and partially because of what happened, I started to read books again. I feel like I almost forgot how to read. I love reading, and it was unfortunate that I lost interest in it for about a year. O_O
I also started to write. I wanted to get away from the internet. It was hard, seeing as I’m usually connected all the time. But I’m still working on my novel. I made a goal to get to 15,000 words by the end of January and I’m already past 12,500! The month has just started, too. I really love writing. It was my decision to write a novel late last year. I decided I’d try it again, as I haven’t written narrative in a while – most of my 2010 written works were poetry.
I thought I would not be able to survive without the internet. I spent many hours fixing it today, because it went down. I could have used that time to watch Doctor Who and just forget about the internet for some time. But because it is such a part of my life (oh man, I sound like a real hermit now), I felt like I was neglecting something if I were to just leave it and let the problem “solve itself”. So I tackled it, and the internet kept going down. I felt annoyed when it was already late afternoon and realised that I really could have watched Doctor Who instead of trying to fix the internet. At this point I was nearly in tears from frustration. The internet didn’t work on any computers, laptops or iPhones/iPods. Normally I’d have cried a lot by then. But I was merely annoyed. The internet had been down but I was okay without it.
In the end I yanked out the wireless router and it turns out that that was giving us hell. 😐 I can’t use the wireless at all now, but at least I can live with being plugged in with a cable from my laptop to the modem. That’s fine with me; after all I don’t move my laptop around.
But I feel like that was almost a “good” waste of time. Sometimes I don’t know what a good waste of time is. What an oxymoron. I mean, sometimes I think, “Gosh, I spent an hour playing Minesweeper with James. I could have done one of the other things I planned.”
But I certainly don’t regret changing my plans to play those games. Some things are worth the time, even if they come up at the last minute. Play games when you like. Go out with your friends if you can, even though they just called you up to go out and you just woke up. Blog when you want. Get off the internet without feeling guilty for being inactive on Twitter. Or Facebook. Just do what you like. 🙂