Shades Of Grey

I have opened my scribble portfolio at Meladori so please visit. There is no commenting system there but if you think I should add one, let me know!

Visit the affiliates page. I have cleaned out affiliates. And those under “pending deletion” are on hiatus or are being warned. I would like my affiliates to be friends with me and keep in touch often.

I’ve been working on that most of the day. Meladori, as promised, is open. I still have about 100 or so scribbles to scan and add, but that’s as far as I have gone, and that’s enough for you to ogle at now, I suppose. πŸ™‚

That’s a bit less on my plate.

Lately, I have been feeling very stressed out. At the present moment while typing, I am feeling quite bouncy and happy – my usual self.

However, since starting university for second semester, I have felt like there is a huge weight on my shoulders. I know that no one expects me to do so much and return every single comment quickly or anything – but since that is my nature, I feel like I must do it.

What’s more, I enjoy it. I enjoy conversing with people. But now and again there is a time where you need to take a break. For me, that time is now. I’m just going to be a bit slow with things for the next few days. I won’t be leaving at all. I will still be here, but I will be taking things slowly. I will return all comments and work on my website/s as I do, but I will be taking my time with them.

I have been very tired, emotional and stressed these past few days. I haven’t been very organised. I have done a lot of website work, and I know people are amazed and think I am superwoman to balance everything on my head, but no.

I’m not superwoman. Now things are starting to stress me out. I talked to James for the first time in over a day. (I don’t count our phone conversation as proper talk, because we were both half asleep… but it was so lovely to hear his voice. β™₯️ ) We have so many stupid arguments all the time; I don’t know why we bother picking at each other. πŸ˜… I love him too much.

I did have an awful day yesterday. I was completely unproductive and it took me so long to do my homework as well. I cried. I felt lonely, and upset. Partially, it’s also because the other day when I picked up my guitar, and reminded myself of my piano lessons, I started to feel nostalgic and just very upset.

I felt like I couldn’t hold onto my talent anymore. And again, it reminds me of ballet. I did ballet for about seven years, before I stopped, because school got in the way. My ballet teacher wants me to go back, and complete my last grade, and do my teacher’s certificate.

I was not very far off at all. And now I think my feet, like my hands, won’t be able to do these things anymore. It sort of breaks my heart; I feel like I should not have quit these things in the first place.

I’m a bit scared to go back. But I have to go on, I guess.

With university work, I’m not behind, but I know that I continually procrastinate (by doing site work; how odd), and I must stop. I am planning to study another degree next year, along with what I am doing now. It is going to be very hard if I decide to, and I might even have less time for my hobbies, but I haven’t quite thought about it thoroughly.

I just had to let this out; I’m sorry for all the moody blogs lately. Right now I’m feeling a lot better though; my friends have kept me going. β™₯️

Just keep in mind, these next few days, I’ll be taking things a bit slow with everything. Taking my time. πŸ™‚

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