Giving tradition a kick up the backside

Earlier I was reading Cat’s recent blog post about her wedding plans, and I watched the beautiful video that her wedding photographer had created for her. Of course, I’m one of those girls who has always dreamed of being swept off her feet by Monsieur Awesome, Prince Charming, or The Doctor – and this got me thinking about when I would get married and/or have a wedding.

I used to be really excited about it, I’ll be honest, but as time goes by, I don’t think that it’ll be as princessy and amazing as I imagine it will be. I do want to get married and celebrate with a wedding, but over the past few months I’ve thought about what a ridiculous idea that is. I see quite a few couples who are happy not being married, or happy being engaged for years, or just have some other kind of commitment to each other that isn’t exactly legal marriage. Many people say marriage is overrated, and I suppose it is, in a way, but I can’t help but think that this lovely dream of getting married is a dream that should come true.

With a few exceptions.

I’m a girl, and by tradition, I should have a bunch of girls with whom I should have a wonderful hen night with, on the night before my wedding. Well, newsflash honey – I have one real, true girlfriend, Lilian, and she means the world to me – and the way I see it, she’ll be my maid of honour. Which leaves me with no bridesmaids. Already this imagined wedding taking place in my head is not going to turn out right.

I do have friends, but the rest of them are guys. I’ve brought it up before, and I wouldn’t be totally against the idea of having male bridesmaids. 😛 So I’ll really be the centre of attention. I am often used to being the only girl in a group. Not surprising. On that note, I start thinking about the reception and the speeches my friends will make about me. I don’t think many of them will want to speak. I went to my cousin’s wedding last year, and all her girlfriends gave a speech. Well, Lilian’s definitely giving a speech, but there isn’t anyone else. James and I also have a lot of mutual friends. They’d probably end up speaking for both of us.

Oh, I jumped a bit ahead there didn’t I? I was imagining of course my future husband, who is none other than James. Sorry, forgot to mention that.

You may now kiss the bride!

Oh no, wait. Pause. Rewind. Play.

I don’t want a diamond wedding ring or a silver band. I want an onyx ring for my wedding ring. No, I’m not having a red dress, even if red is my favourite colour. I think I’ll stick with the white.

At the reception, I’m just going to be a bitch and make everything Japanese, and not care if people like sushi or not. Wait – no… James is a terrific cook; how about we just cook our own food for the wedding instead of doing some catering whizzwooz? Maybe because it’d eat up a lot of our time, I guess. At this rate, my mum might invite soooo many people to the wedding, also keeping in mind how big our family is.

So when I throw the bouquet, who’s going to be there? I’m thinking of all my relatives right now (even the distant ones), and I can’t think of many female cousins who aren’t already married. I have a lot of young female relatives who are about… ten years old? Hmm, maybe I’m thinking too far into this. When I’m older they’ll be in their twenties or so. I guess it won’t be so bad then.

Alright, forgive me if I sound a fool, but I never really favoured the idea of the bride’s garter being thrown towards the bachelors. It seems strange and a little disturbing.

Another problem; I’m Catholic, really, but there’s no way I want to get married in a church. For me it’s too… too traditional? I feel like it doesn’t suit me, getting married in a church. I’d rather a garden wedding, or one in a large hall. I don’t mind the setting of a church, but I don’t really want my wedding to have any religious aspect. Anyone can disagree with me. But there’s a chance that not all guests will be too keen on praying…

Now I begin to think that tradition is ridiculous. Years ago, Lilian told me that she was going to get married in ripped jeans. I used to think that was a silly idea. Now I don’t so much anymore. 😕 Well, I’m nowhere near getting married, so I think I should just let my mind wander however it wants for now.

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