Favourite Worst Nightmare

It’s the friends you can call up at 4am that matter.

I sent James a text message this morning at about 6:00am. It’s Sunday, so usually I wake up late – the earliest probably being 9:00am. The reason I sent him a text message was because I had a really horrible nightmare. It wasn’t the kind of nightmare that woke me in shock, screaming. It wasn’t the kind of nightmare that made me wake up shaking. It wasn’t the kind of nightmare after which I woke up crying.

I guess my definition of “nightmare” varies greatly from what it was as a kid. For starters, I have rarely had a nightmare that has technically made me wake up. Most of the “nightmares” I’ve had have been night visions that sequentially end, before I wake up and then, thinking over the dream I had, shake in fright.

Delayed reaction? Yeah, I’ve been known to be like that. I have delayed reactions to a lot of things. When someone surprises me, my yelp of shock is usually delayed – but by a millisecond – though still noticeable.

The nightmare I had this morning before waking up was extremely disturbing. I’ve had dark dreams like this before, but this was horrific. I was witnessing a man, dressed in a large black coat, brutally stabbing a woman, mainly targeting her nether regions. Blood was splashing everywhere and he’d pretty much cut her body in half vertically. I was in some kind of underground carpark, and it was half flooded with water. If I recall correctly, it wasn’t raining, but the pipes on the ceiling had burst and we were being showered down with this revolting sewerage water.

The man then stripped the woman of her clothing and proceeded to rape her; at this point perhaps she was dead and he was engaging in some form of necrophilia. Fuck. It made me shudder, and I don’t even remember how I got away, or if that cloaked man came after me…

Some of my fears, apart from being murdered (ugh…), is being alone, getting lost, and the dark. Yes, I’m 19 years old and still very much afraid of the dark. Before I woke up, I dreamt that I got lost in an unknown country. Whenever I asked anyone where I could catch a bus, they would recite the number “714” like a mantra – “seven one four, seven one four…”. They refused to say anything else. I woke up from the dream, hiding under my blanket; the sun was up but I was extremely scared, recalling the man in black.

My earliest nightmare happened when I was five years old. When I was five, everything scared me. And as I said, my idea of nightmare now differs from back then.

I had dreamed that I was sitting on some lilypads in a pond, and it was a little dark. A bit like twilight, though it could have been later. I could not detect what the light source was. I thought I was safe until these giants and monsters came into view – at least, their feet and lower body parts did, amongst the plants and weeds that surrounded the pond. I was small. I was tiny.

They were playing some game of ball with a huge red ball. It was probably not huge for them, of course. I managed to move out of the way of one, until many came bounding in my direction. They seemed like light airy balls which could bounce easily and would not be hard – but I was still terrified.

I remember standing up and running in the dream, running and jumping across lilypads. I could feel myself screaming, but no sound came out. I woke up and my room was partially dark – I only had my nightlight on (as usual, and I still have one now). I looked around, obviously I was alone, then I started crying. I could have gotten up and ran to my mum’s room but I was scared to get out. I was too scared. I called for her instead, and she came. ♥

Nightmares are peculiar things.

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