Farewell And Goodnight
I find some people really bitter and lack respect towards anyone. Some people are so obnoxious about things when they do not even know what is going on; when they can’t even, you know, take things the right way. Things they read, see, hear, even hear about by word of mouth. Maybe if people properly understood the things they came across, they wouldn’t be so rude and insensitive about it and just go and literally tell the world, or say it out loud in public, just for the sake of something to say or just because they have an opinion. Sometimes they’re just secretly jealous, angry, or can’t let go of things. It’s like they find it nice to assume or say things about other people.
You know this thing about privacy and stuff? It’s like that. There are things better left unsaid, but even so, things you say can be found out by other people, be it nice, personal, secret, or just plain malicious.
This is hard for me to write. I don’t know why. It’s simple to say these things, and well, it’s kind of obvious and unexpected at the same time too.
I’ve fallen behind with the site. (Oh wow, Georgina, no shit, of course you have.)
And to be honest, a small part of me relaxes. My review queue is large and I still have comments to return. I know you all know me for getting things done quickly, getting them done fast. But I have a lot on my plate, and this time more than I have ever written about before.
I came to the point where I thought I should get a different blog to write about more private things. But some of you, keep me going. A lot of you, make me smile. You might not know that, or think about it. But when I’m down and I write a stupid moody blog, you still read it, and that means a lot to me.
Secretly, I complain about the comments I get. Sometimes I complain about returning them. But the truth is that deep down I love talking to you all through these little messages and I love reading your blogs. It entertains me. I find a friend in a lot of you people.
Sometimes I complain about the number of comments. I complain about the amount. A large amount annoys me.
At the same time a small amount annoys me. I’m so used to getting a lot of comments that sometimes I worry if I get so little. I don’t worry that people aren’t reading my blog, but it’s like I have obsessive compulsive disorder with my comments and that they have to be even and all the comments on all the blogs have to have the same or roughly similar amount of comments.
I’m just weird. I’m funny about many things. I’m terrible at telling stories. I am so snappy and angry sometimes. But still, you read my blogs. My heart goes out to you all.
Now, it’s a difficult time for me. Especially for those of you who read my last blog. It’s getting a bit hard. It’s nearing the end of the year, academically, and soon my first year of university will be over.
I registered Heartdrops a year ago. Just over a year ago, my site was full of suck and barely anyone visited it. Exactly a year ago, I was studying like mad for my HSC exams, but at the same time, I was determined to make this site and open it.
It was probably one of the best decisions I made in the past year.
I’ve come so far in many ways.
Right now I just wanted to send the message that I appreciate all these comments and compliments and friends. I’m stuffing my face with these two large assignments I have to do. And there are things to do on the site. I might not be able to get to the reviews for a week or so. I might be slow with returning comments. But even when I don’t return them, it amazes me how you still drop by. I’m just really stressed out now, but I’m not worn out. I still have all the strength in me.
I know I can do it. The next couple of weeks will be a bit tough while I pull myself together. And while I’m going through this tough time, I’ll try not to doubt that you’ll still support me.
But you will, right? :)