About me, again

The web design company I work for has a website showcasing our work and some other information. Soon I will have to place a photo of myself and a short profile about me on the staff page. I was oddly excited at this thought, but now for some reason I don’t really know what I should write. I’m used to writing about myself, but for some reason I got stuck wondering what to write about myself in light of the work I do. My boss said to me to write some “cheesy text” about what I like. 😆 Well, I guess that’s not that hard.

I had to update our portfolio of work with screenshots and descriptions, but I had no idea what to write for that either…

“Do you want any particular text for the screenshots?”
“… What do you want me to write?”
“Come on, you’re a blogger!”

Yes, I’m a blogger, I’m a writer… but I can’t help but criticise my own writing, as writers do. As a writer I struggle to call something perfect, there is always room for improvement, and there is always something flawed. It is always eerie reading over my own work when I’m not comfortable with it. Many times I know I have done a less than perfect job – when I write a song, a blog post, a story, an essay – perhaps because I’ve rushed it or not really given it as much thought as I could have. With a lot of those works, once they’re finished, they hide away and they’re never looked at again. But writers will always be their own worst critic, and somehow I find it useful to take in the advice of my boss: IF it doesn’t come to you naturally, don’t force it.

So maybe if I want to say I’m a hyperactive girl who loves photography, first dabbled in HTML in 2000… hmm, I guess I can easily think of some “cheesy text”. 😉

The 1000-piece jigsaw puzzle I’ve been working on still isn’t finished. I was hoping to finish it by today by working on it in my work breaks or in the mornings, but I just realised how horrible the green in the finished photograph is. It’s mortifying. I have done most of the puzzle and it looks as if there isn’t much left, but when I look at the pieces, there are probably another hundred to go. There are such large spaces of green and I swear all the pieces I have left are green and roughly of the same texture. It’s such a challenge. I don’t think I’ll want to do another puzzle for a while coming…

I don’t mean to get bitchy about what I’m going to write about next, but it’s in regards to my last web designing job. Now I don’t know what is with people and not getting straight to the point, beating around the bush, or just being plain horrible, but when you fire someone or don’t want someone to work from you anymore, as an employer, it’s really in your best interests to tell someone to leave your company properly. After reading The 10 Worst Things to Say When You Fire Someone, I started thinking about – well, not times I’d been fired, but – times I’d been kicked off without being told directly.

I used to work for a small radio station, a gig my friend helped me out with. He knew I was a web designer, and he did segments for this online radio station. I helped them redesign their website, and I did the best I could, but my client was not very cooperative at all. I will save bad experiences for another day. Towards the end of that gig, I remember not having been paid when I was supposed to, and I emailed the client to sort out the issue. Several days later I found that all my work had been deleted and replaced with some default theme/template. To me, it was obvious what the message was. They clearly did not like my work and just cut me off. I didn’t bother trying to contact them again. I waited until I was paid the last of my hours, and that was that.

It only serves to remind me of the job I had for a few months last year. It was great, it was a good environment and all my colleagues were nice. But I was talked to in private and told that I needed to speed up a little and continue developing my skills in my own time. To me, that’s not what work is about. If you’re working, you’re meant to be gaining experience and sometimes learning. I don’t go to work just to go home and learn something for work. That’s what employers are for. To train you to be the best employee you can be for them.

One day, I was on the way to work, and I got a phone call from my supervisor. He apologised for the late notice and told me not to come in. He said that there were no resources for the project I was going to do, and it was unfortunate that the client hadn’t sent the files over. Okay, fair deal.

Now I realise how suspicious that was when I emailed and asked if any work was available and when I could come in, and still, two weeks later, there was no work for me. Yet I still had a book I borrowed from them, and they wanted it back, and I had to go out of my damn way to return it. James said it was as if I’d been unofficially fired. I’m thinking now – five months on – that perhaps I was. I mean, them wanting their book back and saying “We really need it” was probably a sign that that was it.

I hate when people give you false hope; I held off looking for jobs while I waited weeks and weeks. I mean, if someone isn’t good for your company and you have to fire them, do it properly instead of still being legally bound to them… geez. It doesn’t matter if you get the “you’re fired” or you’re just never called up again. It still sucks.

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