Endless, Nameless

I’ll be honest… when I got into blogging I had no idea that I would get a lot of comments every day. I didn’t have any idea of how huge this “blogging world” really was, or how many different people I would actually meet and get the chance to talk to. I’ve become really close to some, and when we share the same interests in blogging, it makes me smile.

Yes, it’s been a really tough time trying to return comments, and sometimes I don’t always have much to say back. Sometimes I might not continue a conversation, but what broadens my horizons is reading the blogs of others – maybe someone in the same city, the same country, or maybe on the other side of the world. (Though, yes, it’s become quite a habit to respond to comments. It’s pretty tiring.)

I’ve heard stories from bloggers who don’t want to tell “offline friends” or family about their websites or blogs. Whether it be from embarrassment or just wanting privacy, or for whatever other reason. I’ve never really been in that position, but I am also not one to flaunt the fact that I have a website where I blog regularly. It’s not that I’m completely used to the attention, but blogging is a huge part of what I enjoy doing, and of who I am. I’m not afraid to tell people when it comes up in conversation.

Admittedly, I had friends in the past who, despite being my friends, didn’t really care about me having a blog. They never really asked about it. It didn’t bother me, but what sort of “hurt” was when some of them didn’t see the point of blogging, and one person even made fun of it.

Blogging opens up a little world for me. Because of commonalities between bloggers, I feel not only close to them, but a bit like it’s a small world.

Sometimes, though, I dislike “small world” things. I remember bumping into a lot of old friends, or even new ones, who would immediately hack out their phone and ask for my name or email address…

“How come you’re not on Facebook?”

To me – a girl without Facebook – I don’t think it would make a lot of difference if I got one. It kind of scares me that the world seems smaller when someone has a Facebook account; keeping in touch with old friends and their family. But personally, I don’t want that. I want to keep those friends close to me, close… and sometimes I think – really – there’s a reason why they’re called “old friends”. Who are they? They don’t mean anything to me anymore. I might think about them when someone mentions “primary school”, but I don’t want to know them. They’re just like old names in an address book where the numbers don’t work.

Just because there’s Facebook, doesn’t mean I want to suddenly keep in touch with people. If I wanted to, or if they wanted to – they would have phoned me up, a long time ago, before there was Facebook.

I anticipate that I’d probably be friends on Facebook with many people if I did have an account. Yet I don’t see why I need one. I’ve got friends who I talk to on MSN; I have their phone numbers; I know where they live; we meet up from time to time.

Maybe I like being different… The same way I’m different from my classmates, because I have a website and most of them don’t.

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