I hope you come around

Well, I didn’t go. My mum thought it would be nice to just “ban” (whatever word you want to put here, really) me from going to Jebediah’s show, so I didn’t go. Yeah, it’s ludicrous alright. Yeah, I got really upset and angry. Yes, I tried talking to her. Yes, I tried everything, besides, it’s too late now. I would be there right now if I had gone. I would have had a good time. But no, I didn’t go. I won tickets for a show, I planned to go with Seb, and suddenly, this happens.

It was just over little things. I didn’t do the washing right away, because I forgot until later. I didn’t put sunscreen on and she got mad. I just… I don’t know.

Brandon, my brother, only fifteen, is nice to talk to sometimes. He understands how I feel, even though it’s not really me crying and him giving me a hug or anything like that, but we talk about it. We discuss our problems and I know he approaches me when he wants advice on education or school things because I have more experience than him in that aspect. I find that we talk easily about our hobbies or when we have funny stories to share. It’s nice because in the past we never usually got along – we fought a lot. Now I’m able to talk to him and he tried to help me reason with my mum, or at least, help me sort of get over the fact that she just wouldn’t let me go to the show.

It wasn’t hard to take, at first, my mum snapping at me saying I wasn’t going, saying it was final, saying there was nothing I could do to make her change her mind. I wanted to rage. Well, I did, but in appropriate words, still remembering that I’m trying not to swear/cuss. I could have screamed, but no, I didn’t. I considered running away, just going for it. Not after she threatened to change all the locks on the doors of the house so I couldn’t get inside.

If she threatens me so much, if she doesn’t want me inside, why can’t I just get kicked out? Ugh.

I was very upset and angry. Over the course of the evening, feeling obviously sorry for myself, I kept thinking about how I’m twenty years old and this should not even happen, I shouldn’t feel like a prisoner in my own house. Erin and Jennifer talked it out with me and even though I really am not in a place to move out, one day I will, I will be able to – they helped me look on the bright side.

Still, I am upset because I honestly didn’t realise how much live music meant to me until now, until one opportunity was taken away so brutally from me like that. Why, in the past, when I wasn’t allowed, for whatever reason, I just stuck it out. Why this time, I got so upset. Jebediah aren’t my favourite band. But I love their music. It’s music that I wanted to hear live. What’s more, I won the tickets, but now after this ordeal I would buy them any day, whenever they come to Sydney next. Heck, I’d go to the other side of Australia to see them. But yeah, I’m still angered.

I talked to James, and he tried to get me to look on the bright side. Even just talking it out with someone helps. I feel like James listens even if he doesn’t have a lot to say. I found myself constantly upset, having to announce that I was upset, an emotion which disappeared when I attempted to forget it but kept coming back. I talked to Seb; I felt bad that I’d inconvenienced him, but he forgave me. I feel grateful that I have understanding friends.

I hate what happened, hate what my mum did. I tried talking it out with her. She will never understand how much music means to me. She doesn’t listen to much of it. She doesn’t know how much I love music, how much bands have inspired me. She obviously didn’t know how important this was to me. Well, screw that.

Really though… I have a horrible relationship with my mother, I will admit that. For such a long time. And for such a long time, if ever I was granted one wish, I would wish for us to have a good relationship. If I could be that selfish and just ask for one thing. I care about it. It’s a shame it was just like this. In short, it sucks. I’m telling myself it isn’t the end of the world. I’m still really, really upset, but I know that worse things could happen to me.

Whatever.

Comments on this post

Ngaww you Slump Thing *hug*
glad you feel better. :3 you

Brandon is pretty /hrb ๐Ÿ˜
I hope he doesnt drop his phone. ngeo!

EITS EITS EITS /frog

๐Ÿ‘

Oy, I’m so sorry you didn’t get to go. I saw your tweets about it, but I didn’t know what to say so I said nothing. : Mothers can be so frustrating and irrational and downright infuriating — and so often refuse to even admit that maybe, just maybe, they’re overreacting or making too big a deal of something. That in itself can make the whole thing harder to bear.

The “doesn’t get music” bit is almost as maddening. I’m the same way re: music: I’m pretty sure I actually need to it live — or, at least, need it to stay sane. Live shows are even more important. The music itself may be great, but hearing the band play it live, in a room (room, hall, stadium, whatever) with other people who also love it? There’s an energy and a feeling there one can’t find anywhere else. It’s intense and electric and amazing. People who don’t actually love music, people who listen to it only occasionally, who don’t seek it out, don’t get it. They simply can’t understand why it’s important, and why being denied it is so painful. It’s kind of sad, actually, what they’re missing out on.

All that said, I’m just sorry you had to go through that, and that you have such a less-than-ideal (the nice way to put it, heh) relationship with her. Hopefully one day it’ll get better. :

-sigh- you don’t know how many times mom wont let me go to the concerts even though i won the ticket.. and then on the event day she will ask “why are you looking gloomy” and when I said because I need a live music and there goes she said “oh, why didn’t you go? bla bla bla” when she’s actually the one who didn’t let me go at the first place.. reading your current post is actually freaking me out.. it’s exactly what I want to write on my next update and you already wrote that for me! *hides under the desk* I’ve been in bad terms with my mom a lot these days and most of the time I will just keep quiet even though I always feel like talking back to her..-sigh-

anyway, *hugs* *hugs* *hugs*

don’t stop the music and listen to them more because it will make you feel better ๐Ÿ˜Š

i totally hear you. it’s terrible fighting with parents or loved ones. sometimes in the heat of the moment, it’s easy to yell or argue back but sometimes i find what helps more is trying to both listen to what each other has to say which can help ease the situation. hoping things get better โ™ฅ๏ธ

-Joyce

Yeah, I love the layout! I can’t thank Karin enough letting me use it. She was really nice. ๐Ÿ™‚ The layout makes my site look totally different though! In a good way! lol Its just something really different and I like it. ๐Ÿ™‚

Its good that you and your brother, Brandon have such a close relationship. It probably makes this all easier, since he’s actually right there. He knows more about what’s going on and can relate.

I know that what you’re going through is hard. Your mum is just UGH. And I get it. Its hard and its upsetting and its unfair. But don’t let it get you down. You have a great future ahead of you. You have so much, even though its hard to see it some times. Things will get better. You just need to keep looking up. I know that isn’t easy, but we’re always here for you. I, personally, am too.

Just keep your head up and look to the beautiful future. You have great friends and a great life ahead of you! Let that be the light that helps you make it through. ๐Ÿ™‚

Awww. that’s so sad to know ๐Ÿ˜ I feel you. Not allowing you to come to the show which really make you feel inspired, is such a not-so-good-thing. Brandon is so sweet as well as your understanding friends ๐Ÿ™‚ How I wish you would have a good relationship with your mom too.

It’s crazy how much I can relate to this right now. For the past two months, the only musician I’ve been listening to is Mac Miller. I can pretty much guarantee you won’t enjoy his music, since it’s rap, but I’ve fallen in love with it, mostly because it isn’t just rap–he sings as well. His lyrics are very fun and his songs are upbeat. A lot of them even have quite a bit of meaning. Anyways, he came to Las Vegas a week ago or so and I asked my mom if I could go with my friend, Hanna. She told me “Absolutely not!” because the House of Blues (where the concert was) doesn’t allow anyone under 18 to be without someone who is 16+. I find that to be very confusing, but that’s their rule. ๐Ÿ˜ฐ Anyways, we were going to have her brother take us (he’s 17) but he decided he didn’t want to. I can’t even explain how upset I was. It wasn’t just because I’d missed Mac Miller’s concert (I was definitely upset about that!), it was because I’d also missed All Time Low in April 2011 and A Day to Remember at the Warped Tour 2011. Basically, all of my favorite musicians have come during the same year and I’ve missed each show.

ANYWAYS, I think your mom was wrong for not letting you go, and definitely wrong for telling you she’d change the locks. There’s no reason to say something like that. You won the tickets and it’s just a show! The laundry can always be done tomorrow, and the sunscreen can always be applied in less than two minutes. But, then again, a lot of people lose their common sense once they become angry and no longer think clearly, so everything becomes…well…fuel for the fire.

I wish you the best of luck with your mom. It’s good you have your brother and James to help you. Who knows what you would do without them??

Take care, Georgie. โ™ฅ๏ธ

I know that feeling and that feeling sucks. BIG. TIME. My mother is sometimes like that and I’ve experienced your situation a couple of times in the past so, you’re not exactly alone. Perhaps, in the future, you may be able to reach out and talk to her about things calmly — maybe over a cup of coffee, like most adults do? I hope you feel better soon, Georgie!

I’m sorry to hear that you’re not getting along with your mother. I’m in the exact same boat as you, only I’m not on good terms with ANYONE in my family. I’ve never really had a good relationship with anyone in my family, and it’s gotten way worse recently. I was living at my parents house again, me and my dog (who is probably the best dog in the world, he’s amazing). My boyfriend’s parents caused some problems for my boyfriend so he decided that he was staying with me for a while. Which was always the plan, as my parents knew. All of a sudden my parents both freaked out and said that my boyfriend wasn’t able to stay anymore unless he started paying 300 a month.

He didn’t want to do that, so he went back home for a few days. One night we were playing a game with a friend of mine at my parent’s. My dog was laying beside us on the couch, and my parents told the dog to get down. He did, but then shortly after jumped back up. He was calmly laying on the couch and my mother freaked out and started saying that my boyfriend abandoned me and if I didn’t like how things were going then I should have MADE him pay for us to stay at our old place (along with a lot of other stuff but it’s so much I won’t get into it). So my boyfriend stood up for me and himself and said that I was right and they shouldn’t treat me like that. My mother then told him to get out of her house and he was not welcomed there again. I told her to quit being insane and such a bitch, so then she kicked me out.

She claims that she still loves me and shit, but I don’t believe she’s ever loved me. She’s insane and I cannot stand her. Caleb and I now have our own place again, but only because we had no other choice. It’s frustrating and hurtful, but I’ve learned to live with it.

Sorry for the huge rant but parents are sometimes the worst people in the world. I’m jealous of the people who actually have good relationships, cause that’ll never be me.

Hear ya, hear ya. Sometimes, moms can just be so annoying. I hope you’ll feel better soon. ๐Ÿ˜„

What a horrible mother you have. I can’t find any other words for it. ๐Ÿ˜ž I wish she could understand you some more and that you two were able to have a good relationship. But I really can understand that you’re getting mad. *hug*

Before I forget, I removed wordpress from my pacificity site- and I realized that my “I Love” post got messed up. So I moved it on to satisromance where wordpress will be there definitely.

http://satisromance.org/content/i-love/

Sorry โ˜น๏ธ

I don’t understand why your mother decided to ban you from Jebediah’s show! It’s just weird, but what?! As they say, you can cry over spilled milk- but why would you? ๐Ÿ˜ถ.

It’s nice to have a brother to talk to sometimes. Fights are natural so don’t even worry about it!

Running away is the last thing you want to do. And as for moving out- you’re still going to University. Why not just suck it up for another 2 years or so, finish your Masters, then move out with a new job? It’s much less of a bothersome.

Moms can always be a drag, but there’s one thing you can’t change: She’s still your mother. I mean, later on you must move out eventually. Don’t make this the sole reason.

Finance class is fun! My friend and I look forward to it every time ๐Ÿ˜›!

I hate making up tests ๐Ÿ˜ž! But still, economics is close to what I learn in Finance so it boosted my self-esteem up for the test ๐Ÿ˜„! But than kyou ๐Ÿ™ƒ!

Breaking Dawn was meh, but I find it more “intense” than any other movie. Or is it because of Bella being pregnant? ๐Ÿ˜ฎ! I know I get iffy when people are pregnant and they’re in pain โ˜น๏ธ.

I personally think Facebook is becoming a bit ridiculous. I see a lot of “depressed” statuses and I want to make a “rude comment”, but meh ๐Ÿ˜ฆ!

It’s your decision in who to choose ๐Ÿ˜„! I’m just too busy with things these days :/. I still haven’t gone around and do my college apps yet :/. Dang it! ๐Ÿ˜ฆ!

Take care(:?

Aw thanks for the compliment ๐Ÿ˜„ I kind of just did like whatever because I just wanted to get my site back up & running ๐Ÿ˜†

Thanks! Haha Thanksgiving is a great holiday. It really brings everyone together & we just all take a moment to appreciate everything that we have. Do you have any sort of holiday in Australia similar to Thanksgiving?

Haha I love wearing my socks to bed (just not in the summer ๐Ÿ˜†, obviously). I can have like 10 blankets, but my feet will still be ice cold so socks help ๐Ÿ˜„

Haha I wouldn’t usually want to see a movie just because of a song, but I’ve seen all of the other movies, so I figured that I might as well watch the final one (well part 1 of the final). I thought the books were alright so I’m mainly just looking forward to seeing how the book is portrayed.

To Kill a Mockingbird is a good book. My teacher made us analyze the book a lot and it’s kind of interesting how the author wrote the book. There are a lot of repeating conflicts and themes & the book reflects her life a lot. There’s a lot of symbolism in the book which I found really fascinating. You should really look into the book! ๐Ÿ˜„

Aww it really does suck how your mom wouldn’t let you go to the concert. You’re more than old enough to make your own decisions. I hope you do get a chance to see them! At least you have your brother & your friends to brighten your bad days ๐Ÿ™ƒ When my sister’s upset she usually talks to me about it. It’s so odd because like your brother & you, we use to ALWAYS fight. But we kind of grew out of it. It’s nice that you & your brother have a good relationship :]

I wish that she’d understand you because I think that everyone deserves a relationship with their parents.

Most of us have these kinds of problems with our parents, and hopefully, your mom will come around someday. Even so, I always thought that we should let the little things go, and I disagree with your mom if she banned you from going for forgetting a bunch of small things. Every relationship advice column I’ve looked at has told people to just let the little things go. At the very least, you know that you won’t be living with your parents forever and that you’ll probably move out after you’re done with school. I hear that moving out does wonders to parent-child relationships sometimes.

I hope that Seb enjoyed the concert by himself! Concerts don’t tend to be fun without other people.

Also, *hugs*

im so sorry you couldnt go to the show.. mothers can be so overprotective and such. i disagree with your moms reasoning because you could’ve done that later or something. maybe she was just having a bad day and she took it out on you.
i hope Seb took photos and will tell you everything that happened and it will feel like you were there.
you lucky you got a brother like that. my sister and i were never close and still not i dont think we’ll ever be because im always scared she blows up and ruins it so ye i think whats the use ๐Ÿ˜ž

Aww it’s a shame you couldn’t go! And now i see why you were asking me about taking a DSLR to a concert. Well i hope that you and your mum can slowly work things out over time. Maybe when you guys have both cooled down and are getting along better, you can try to have a chat to her about how you want to try and develop a better and closer relationship together? So that she’s aware of the fact that you actually DO WANT to get on with her better?

Although I find it a little warped that she’s banned you from going to a concert at this age… I mean, I know you’re still living under her roof, but gosh, as mad and outrageous as my mother has been to me, i haven’t been “banned” from going to a gig since I was like 15, 16 and deemed (too young) for certain things.